Breaking Ground

I have been toying with the idea of a blog for a while now. There is so much on my mind. So much to say. So many wild and crazy ideas that need exploring. Brainstorming. Analyzing. Processing. Honest evaluation. My only problem is WHERE to begin and how to approach all that I have bottled up inside.

That is probably why I called my first entry Breaking Ground. It forces me to acknowledge that I can do this if I so choose. And as of this moment I so choose. I see no reason to delay it any longer.

Lets get started. Keep in mind that this blog will bounce around a LOT! That is because it is a brainstorming blog. And I am going to follow ideas for a while and switch gears to chase down other ideas. Your comments and ideas are welcome. Send them to BrainstormingLife@yahoo.com

Soul mates. Yes. I know. A VERY serious topic to begin with. But hey why wait? Lets go for the serious stuff right away rather than beating around the proverbial bush for months. I want to explore several ideas over the next few weeks.

OK lets brainstorm! Do soul mates exist? Can they exist? Where are they? How do you find? Or do they find you? Can you create one out of nothing or is there something that must exist for it to happen?

Is a soul mate created when two people fundamentally agree on a core set of ideas and principals? Are they seeds we plant in each others heart and then grow and nurture? If this is a possibility then we must agree that any two people could be soul mates. That there is nothing stopping them from being such other than effort and/or desire. A little work by both parties and BAM. Soul mate city? Relationship bliss?

I am not so sure it works like that because if it did I think there would be a lot more fulfilling marriages in this world. I think most of us step up to the alter with nothing but hope and promise in our hearts, ready to face the world with our most important ally in life, our spouse. So what goes wrong? Where did the soul mate rift begin? Or did it just never start in the first place? Simply agreeing to a promise of love and sharing an address doesn’t mean you planted the seed. You don’t drive home from the honeymoon, step inside, and expect the seed has sprouted.

No. I think that is just not possible. Both people need to be on the same page. They need to both WANT the other to be their soul mate. Both people need to plant their own seed and nurture and grow that seed. It is not enough for one to do it. And one person cannot plant and nurture for two people. Clearly it is an individual choice. And herein lays the problem I think 99% of all marriages face. One person is there, tending the seed, happy in the thought that they have a soul mate, and they cannot figure out why in the world the other person isn’t doing the same thing. WHY in the world doesn’t he/she water the seed in my heart??? Is there something wrong with me? Have I done something that makes them not want to water it? Do they think they dont need to water it that planting it was good enough? Or was it good enough to simply say "I do" and move in?

I don’t think anyone would argue that placing the ring on a finger constitutes planting a seed. I think the seed should have been planted long before you got that far into the relationship. But hey, ANY place along the line is better than no place in my book.

HEART WORK: I am coining a new phrase. You heard it here first! Heart work is home work for the heart. I think everyone should read "Five Love Languages" by Dr. Gary Chapman. This book will teach you how to water the seed in your soul mates heart. When you read this book do it with a twist on things. What I mean is...don’t just read it to figure out your partners love languages, read it and try to identify yours. There is a little test that helps you figure yours out...but that’s not good enough. See what else could be done to fill your tank. Figure out how to make it easier for your tank to be full. You will understand that comment if you read the book.

OK enough for the first entry.