I was watching a commercial for the Army and I started thinking about how they market to potential recruits. We have seen the signs for decades of Uncle Sam pointing a stern finger at us and telling us that he needs us. Stop and think and you can hear the song playing “BE! All that you can be! In the Army!” Recently the campaign was “Army of One” and now we have “Army Strong”
Uncle Sam was appealing to our sense of duty. Our sense of patriotism. Our Pride. The desire to contribute something and be a part of history. He called us to serve. In our relationships is that such a bad thing? Is it wrong to want to stir those types of feelings. To give our very best to something (really to someone) that we love? Don’t we want to be proud of what we have in our relationship? Don’t we want to think of ourselves as givers to the relationship? Serving the relationship? I think we do. Or we would not be wasting our time on this blog.
What about the song? Be all you can be. I was brainstorming that idea out and it hit me just how meaningful that idea is. The army says you are good. But come join our team and you can be great. Don’t settle for average. Aspire to bigger and better things. Be more with her than you could be on your own. Be better with her than you could be on your own. Remember that moment at the end of the movie “As Good As It Gets” when Jack Nicholson tells Helen Hunt “You make me want to be a better man.” That’s what a relationship should do for us. It should make us aspire to be our absolute best. And we should be doing everything we can so our partner can be their absolute best.
Army of One. I had to think about this. But not for long. The idea was simple once I gave it a little thought. It’s a lot like the song. Together we are stronger and better than we are alone. Together we are not two against the world. We are a united front. One. A team. Its me and you I have your back you have mine. I lean on you and depend on you and count on you to get me through the hard times and be there to enjoy the good ones. And you do the same with me. Individually we are good. Together we are great.
Finally, we hear tyrants around the world proclaim how they would unleash hell on our army if we dare mess with them. Ya ok. Anything you say pal. Truth be told no country on the planet wants to hear that the USS Ronald Reagan and her battle fleet are sailing toward them to give them the business. One Seawolf submarine is capable of launching 50 Tomahawk cruise missiles that could make a country disappear from the map. Our military has its faults, but its might is unquestionable. Our relationships should be like that. Ya they have their troubles. But at the end of the day their strengths should be the focus and we should draw on the good things they present. They should be a shield for us, defending us against outside forces trying to wear us down and defeat us. When you are under attack, you should turn to your partner for help in your battles. Not just strong. Soulmate Strong.
HEARTWORK: Come up with an advertising plan to promote your relationship to your partner. Think up a new way you can “recruit” your partner to team up with you and strengthen the bond you share. Keep in mind that you want to be better together than you are individually.
Email your plans or your catchy phrases and slogans. They could be fun to share.
brainstorminglife@yahoo.com
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Pina Colodas
If you have ever heard the Escape song, better known as the Pina Coloda song, then you probably can guess where I want to go today.
The song says a lot about how I have been feeling lately. I have all these things running through my heart and mind that I want out of life, and I am just not getting them. So do I say to myself, Self, you are being awfully selfish dont you think? Or do I say Self, Life is SHORT. You should not let it slip by without having LIVED it.
I told someone the other day that my biggest fear would be one day waking up old and regret all the things I didnt do because I was afraid, or comfortable, or bound by some other excuse for inaction. So I started to brainstorm that idea. What WOULD I do if I really had the courage? What would I change? What would I put more effort into? What needs to go and what needs more of my attention?
OK before we go any further let me tell you where I part from the song. The woman posted her ad for the escape and she had not tried to fix things with her man. Well we have to read that into it because there is no evidence to the contrary. She should have taken the time to make sure her man knew what was on her heart. That he had a chance to step up and fix the relationship. He deserved to know that the relationship was not meeting her needs. But to fair, he didnt do that either. He replied to the ad without taking the time to talk to her.
That I think is the single biggest reason two people dont make it together. An otherwise good thing is allowed to wither and die because the lines of communication are neglected, or simply dont exist. Its even worse when you are afraid to open to him or her because of how they will respond.
OK So he is waiting for her at a bar called OMalleys. And the girl walks in. And he smiles because it is HIS woman. I guess we can say whew, they figured it out before it was too late. But why did it have to get to the point where they were Escaping before the found that this whole time they were looking for each other? I never knew that you liked Pina Coladas. Or getting caught in the rain.
HEARTWORK: Write your own personal ad. Seriously. Write an ad and ask all the questions you have in your heart. Or the most important if the list is just too big. And then give it to your partner. If you are adventurous, mail it to them.
This could be a fun exercise. I bet there are some great ad's stored up in a lot of hearts out there.
Share yours. Brainstorminglife@yahoo.com
The song says a lot about how I have been feeling lately. I have all these things running through my heart and mind that I want out of life, and I am just not getting them. So do I say to myself, Self, you are being awfully selfish dont you think? Or do I say Self, Life is SHORT. You should not let it slip by without having LIVED it.
I told someone the other day that my biggest fear would be one day waking up old and regret all the things I didnt do because I was afraid, or comfortable, or bound by some other excuse for inaction. So I started to brainstorm that idea. What WOULD I do if I really had the courage? What would I change? What would I put more effort into? What needs to go and what needs more of my attention?
OK before we go any further let me tell you where I part from the song. The woman posted her ad for the escape and she had not tried to fix things with her man. Well we have to read that into it because there is no evidence to the contrary. She should have taken the time to make sure her man knew what was on her heart. That he had a chance to step up and fix the relationship. He deserved to know that the relationship was not meeting her needs. But to fair, he didnt do that either. He replied to the ad without taking the time to talk to her.
That I think is the single biggest reason two people dont make it together. An otherwise good thing is allowed to wither and die because the lines of communication are neglected, or simply dont exist. Its even worse when you are afraid to open to him or her because of how they will respond.
OK So he is waiting for her at a bar called OMalleys. And the girl walks in. And he smiles because it is HIS woman. I guess we can say whew, they figured it out before it was too late. But why did it have to get to the point where they were Escaping before the found that this whole time they were looking for each other? I never knew that you liked Pina Coladas. Or getting caught in the rain.
HEARTWORK: Write your own personal ad. Seriously. Write an ad and ask all the questions you have in your heart. Or the most important if the list is just too big. And then give it to your partner. If you are adventurous, mail it to them.
This could be a fun exercise. I bet there are some great ad's stored up in a lot of hearts out there.
Share yours. Brainstorminglife@yahoo.com
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Resolutions
The new year is here an no doubt many resolutions have already been broken. It’s human nature to make promises to ourselves that are designed to better us. The problem is that January 1 is just another day. There really isn’t anything magical about it. A resolution doesn’t care the day you make it. The only day that matters is the day you give up on the resolution.
I want to make a resolution. I resolve to put more effort into this blog. I will work harder on new ideas and share them with you. I hope you will share your thoughts with me as well.
Let’s brainstorm resolutions. What are the most common ones people make? Ding ding ding yes if you said lose weight and get in shape you are correct. Those are the by far the two biggest ones made. Eat healthier. Quit smoking. Give to charity. Be a better spouse. A better person. The list is endless. We know where we are lacking and we put a little extra effort to change that. I applaud everyone who tries. It does take guts to admit to ourselves that we are not measuring up. But what are we really saying about ourselves? Are we really digging deep enough and targeting the real issues?
Physical fitness is central to the most common resolutions right? What about emotional fitness? Sounds silly maybe but why not? Really. If we can devise methods to exercise physically and get in better shape why can’t we devise methods to get others area of our lives in shape too? I think we can. And if that is true I would wonder why we don’t try to work on our emotional fitness.
How do we exercise our emotions? I can think of many ways. Loving someone is a good start. I have long believed that love is an action long before it is an emotion. So we can strengthen our emotions for someone by doing things for them. If you are thinking like I am right now you are trying to come up with idea for things. Where do we start? The 5 love languages offer us a solid blueprint on ideas. Gifts. Quality time. Words of Affirmation. Touch. Acts of service. Any of these will start us in the right direction.
While we are filling their tanks with love, we strengthen our emotional “muscle”. The more we do, the easier it becomes. The more we can lift, so to speak. It is tough running that first mile isn’t it? But after trying and trying and trying it becomes easier and easier. Until a mile is a warm up for a real work out. Can’t an emotional workout do the same thing for us? If we start doing things that grow our affection and love for our partner won’t we find ourselves having deeper stronger emotions?
HEARTWORK: Take the first step. Pick 1 of the items. Words of Affirmation for example. Tell your partner they look pretty, or handsome. Tell them you appreciate them, and you are grateful to have them in your life. Tell them that meal they cooked was just amazing. Put a smile on her pretty face. It doesn’t really matter where you start. Just start. Take the first step. Exercise your emotional connection with your partner and resolve to make that a strong and vibrant part of your life.
I think that is a good start for the new year. Start today. Don’t put it off until it becomes another resolution that goes unrealized. The stakes are too high for that to happen.
Oh and let me clear up something. I really am a guy. Honest.
Do you have ideas for working on your emotional fitness? Write me and share. Brainstorminglife@yahoo.com
I want to make a resolution. I resolve to put more effort into this blog. I will work harder on new ideas and share them with you. I hope you will share your thoughts with me as well.
Let’s brainstorm resolutions. What are the most common ones people make? Ding ding ding yes if you said lose weight and get in shape you are correct. Those are the by far the two biggest ones made. Eat healthier. Quit smoking. Give to charity. Be a better spouse. A better person. The list is endless. We know where we are lacking and we put a little extra effort to change that. I applaud everyone who tries. It does take guts to admit to ourselves that we are not measuring up. But what are we really saying about ourselves? Are we really digging deep enough and targeting the real issues?
Physical fitness is central to the most common resolutions right? What about emotional fitness? Sounds silly maybe but why not? Really. If we can devise methods to exercise physically and get in better shape why can’t we devise methods to get others area of our lives in shape too? I think we can. And if that is true I would wonder why we don’t try to work on our emotional fitness.
How do we exercise our emotions? I can think of many ways. Loving someone is a good start. I have long believed that love is an action long before it is an emotion. So we can strengthen our emotions for someone by doing things for them. If you are thinking like I am right now you are trying to come up with idea for things. Where do we start? The 5 love languages offer us a solid blueprint on ideas. Gifts. Quality time. Words of Affirmation. Touch. Acts of service. Any of these will start us in the right direction.
While we are filling their tanks with love, we strengthen our emotional “muscle”. The more we do, the easier it becomes. The more we can lift, so to speak. It is tough running that first mile isn’t it? But after trying and trying and trying it becomes easier and easier. Until a mile is a warm up for a real work out. Can’t an emotional workout do the same thing for us? If we start doing things that grow our affection and love for our partner won’t we find ourselves having deeper stronger emotions?
HEARTWORK: Take the first step. Pick 1 of the items. Words of Affirmation for example. Tell your partner they look pretty, or handsome. Tell them you appreciate them, and you are grateful to have them in your life. Tell them that meal they cooked was just amazing. Put a smile on her pretty face. It doesn’t really matter where you start. Just start. Take the first step. Exercise your emotional connection with your partner and resolve to make that a strong and vibrant part of your life.
I think that is a good start for the new year. Start today. Don’t put it off until it becomes another resolution that goes unrealized. The stakes are too high for that to happen.
Oh and let me clear up something. I really am a guy. Honest.
Do you have ideas for working on your emotional fitness? Write me and share. Brainstorminglife@yahoo.com
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